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Blog (by JH, no AI)

Thoughts on Psychotherapy

Blog | Dr. Jamey Hecht | Beverly Hills, CA
 
Posts in Regret
If You Could've Done Better, You Would Have

We often want to help people with their regrets, by telling them: “If you could have done any better, you would have. The reason you didn’t, is that you were constrained by your trauma background, your history.” They reply that this is a slippery slope; that if they allow themselves the solace of explaining their bad choices by invoking their past history, they might recklessly let themselves off the hook for all kinds of error—laziness, impulsivity, greed—in the present and the future. But it is not a slippery slope, so long as we locate the determinism in the past, where it belongs, and the freedom in the present, where we need it.

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